In this old-school fps, you play the part of Caleb, member of a demonic cult who was betrayed and murdered when his former lord and master, a dread entity known as Tchernobog, went insane with power. Now, armed with a variety of bizarre weapons (including a pitchfork, a voodoo doll, and a can of flammable hairspray) the reanimated corpse of Caleb must slaughter his way through the hordes of hell in order to avenge his own death and that of his love, Ophelia.

So many things in life are unfair. Lon Chaney died at age 47, and H. P. Lovecraft didn’t even make it that far, but Uwe Boll has a new slate of fall projects lined up! ‘Blood’ never got a console port (also the sequel supposedly sucked out loud, but that’s another review) and it doesn’t even play on modern versions of Windows® . As a consequence, the title has become obscure and is pretty much forgotten today. (A lot of blame for this lies with Monolith Games, who has allowed the series to molder away without further update.) However, in the late 90’s when it originally came out, the game enjoyed industry accolades and the love of gamers all across the globe, and it was well deserving. In the era of ‘Doom 3', it seems strange to remember a time when a pixilated two-dimensional shooter pushed the boundaries of technology.

Looking at them today, the graphics of ‘Blood’ may seem terribly dated in their graininess, but they still carry their own flavor of beauty. You will find yourself maneuvering through some truly unique environments, many (such as a old-timey train station, and a cult-owned mansion) are lovingly decorated in gorgeous art-deco style. (Apparently, Tchernobog hired an interior designer. Who’d a thunk it?) The enemies you’ll be facing look quite good themselves. (Well, “good” as in detailed. You won’t be seeing their pretty faces in many Gap® ads.) Even after all these years, decapitating a fetid corpse with a Tommy-gun blast just gives me a rush. (Oh yes, the game is rather gory, even by today’s standards.)

The sound design is near perfect. The background music is eerie and appropriately mood-setting. The guttural moaning of zombies as they set eyes on your delicious brain is undeniably creepy. The shrill babble of your former cult compatriots (a bastardized mix of Latin and Sanskrit) can send chills up your spine, but repetitiveness is a problem. The line “marana infirmux” gets a little old after you’ve had someone shriek it at you for the 40^th time.

The gameplay itself is tight and responsive. There are lots of excellent little touches in the game, such as duel use weapons. (You can fire one of both barrels of your shotgun; use a can of hairspray as a flamethrower or as a napalm grenade.) Destructible environments add a lot of enjoyment to the proceedings, and the ability to interact with your surroundings (like, say, kicking severed zombie heads around like soccer balls) is quite nifty. The only small problem I had was with the vertical aiming. The controls for looking up and down are a bit touchy, making it hard to draw a bead on rats, bats, and other critters which tend to scurry outside of your normal field of view.

The ambience is well developed. You’ll find yourself trekking through crumbling catacombs and cyclopean temples. Mutilated corpses of cult sacrifices litter the halls, some nailed to the wall like blasphemous crucifixes. If there’s a game which better captures the dark eldritch aura of a Lovecraft tale, I haven’t played it.

Plot is a bit thin, but that which is present does its job well. The simple set up of betrayal, revenge, and lost love carries enough motivation to keep you blasting away. However, the in-game writing is where ‘Blood’ really shines. The game possesses a sick, clever wit. Caleb spews more one-liners than Bruce Campbell and Kurt Russell combined (actually, I guess Duke Nukem would be Campbell and Russell combined, but no one remembers him anymore either) and the game is stuffed full of in-jokes and sly references to the horror genre. (The first level takes place in the “Morningside Funeral Parlor“, the second at “Miskatonic Train Station“.) 
Also, our man Caleb is the only lad I've met that can make showtunes sound sinister.

If you have access to an older version of Windows® , do yourself a favor and download the free ‘Blood’ shareware. (see below) If you have taste for the gruesome, and a tolerance for nostalgia, they don’t come much better than this.

Update 1/29/07;

Since Monolith let the license for Blood waste away (I think they were spending all their time lately on some game called 'F.E.A.R.', who's ever heard of that thing? :-) the game has apparently become abandonware. If you' like to check out the whole game for free, check out my technical spiel here.