Return of the Living Dead 3

Return of the Living Dead 3

Plot:

After his slut of a girlfriend is killed in a motorcycle accident, the son of military researcher uses good ol’ 245 trioxin to bring her back to life. All things considered, not the best decision.

Comments:

What if you could bring back someone you had lost? Would you dare? And could they ever forgive you if you did? C. S. Lewis, in grieving his late wife explored the utter selfishness of wanting the dead alive again;

“Could I have wished her anything worse? Having gotten once through death, to come back and then, at some later date, have all her dying to do over again? They call Stephen the first martyr. Hadn’t Lazarus the rawer deal?”

I meditate long upon this. Then I remember that I’m reviewing a low budget zombie movie, and I decide that my new year’s resolution is to stop drinking.

Paparazzi! Perhaps the weakest point of ‘RotLD 3’ is that it is a continuation of series that really didn’t need any update. As a stand alone zombie film, it’s ok. Though cheap, and cheap looking, there are a few scenes of bloody good sfx. (Supplied by the curiously named Screaming Mad George. Hmm, wonder if he knows Big Crazy Mike.) However the screenplay is a bit weak, and also oddly humorless, though after the insipid jokiness of the second sequel I can see why they wanted to go in a different direction.

(Though it’s a minor quibble, I should note that for all us horror nerds, this installment contains a major plot continuity error. It was previously established that zombies eat brains to quell the pain of their decay. In ’3’, Julie uses pain to tamp down her craving for brains! Basically it’s a cheat to allow some cheap S&M tinged scenes in the later halve of the film. Congratulations, pervs!)

The acting is pretty cruddy, and the leads in particular are weak. Let’s face it, for all her inner beauty, Juliet is pretty much a skank, and none too bright either. (Let’s break into a top secret government weapons research facility! The treat of imminent death gets me all hot!) For all the talk of true love, Curt seems more p*ssy-whiped by his girlfriend than devoted to her. These kids are the typical rebellious teenage morons, and had they lived till their 20’s I imagine they would have looked back on their petulant youth with utter embarrassment. (I think Julie would have made a great real estate agent some day. Nice pants-suit!) Add in a gaggle of Asian and Hispanic stereotypes, (I cut you ese!) an a screenplay that seems more like a protracted chase scene than a plot, and you’ve got a recipe for viewer apathy.

It seemed like a good idea at the time. Then something changes in later half of the film. Being driven by character conflict, the film does have some emotional resonance for us to sink our teeth into. Although these kids start out shallow and unlikable, there is some honest attempt made at character growth and exploration. The resurrected Julie is no longer the careless punk of the first act. Indeed her carefree narcissism is replaced with self loathing (and not a little bit of resentment) as she realizes what she is to become because of her lover’s selfishness. Curt’s dilemma, though brought about by his own self-serving stupidity, is completely understandable. He wishes for a return to a happy past with the woman he loves, even as it slowly dawns on them both that Julie is damned to suffer forever because of him . In its own odd way, this film well illustrates the negativity of attachment which so often masquerades as affection. True love is about doing what’s right for the other person, not keeping their decaying physical form tied to earth in order to give us some pathetic sense of company and comfort. (*Cough* Schiavo *Cough*)

Unfortunately, it’s very hard to explore such complex themes with the rather anemic writing, and pretty hard to deeply feel the pain of such poorly drawn characters.

A tale of doomed romance rather than an apocalyptic nightmare, ’RotLD 3’ can be seen as either deeper or more inconsequential than its first predecessor. I might add that naming the unfortunate young girl Juliet is just a bit too on the nose. C’mon! How unwarranted is a Shakespeare reference in a direct to video zombie film? Why that’s almost as unwarranted as a C.S. Lewis reference in a crappy review of a direct to video zombie movie!

4.5